Barone

(b. 1064 13.E – d. 1123 13.E) The fat, rigid, gruff, obnoxious old wood-elf (or so she believed for all her life, she was really half dwarf, half pig. Her mother was a scientific golden pig called Kerpix, and her father was a dwarf named Fylgar) step-mother of the whole lot more beautiful half princess Veronique, and step-daughter of Verone. For the record, Barone lived all her life in a lie you might say. For all her life she thought she was the actual biological mother of Veronique, and also that she was the biological daughter of Verone. Obviously it rarely occurred to her that both her supposed mother and her supposed daughter were remarkably more beautiful than she was. Verone and Veronique were indeed related though. Barone just wasn’t their medium. The real daughter of Verone was Prince Crispin’s lover, the real mother of Veronique. Prince Crispin and his lover handed over the child to Barone one night when she was asleep (?). Barone worked as a butcher for a living. She was proposed to by a beautiful young prince with long eye-lashes, Crispin. People were very inquisitive about why the beautiful young prince would propose to such an ugly ol’ cow. The reason turned out to be gold-digging. An ironic answer which raised a lot of eyebrows since he was quite wealthy himself. But you could always get richer he used to say. Although they married, the prince didn’t invite her to stay with him in his castle. She stayed instead in her commoner’s hut down in the village below. Shortly after their marriage, she conceived her daughter, Veronique (Veronique was in fact already 5 years old when Barone thought she had conceived her. This managed to avoid her notice though). Veronique turned out to be a gorgeous young woman, in contrast to her nasty mother. Whenever Barone served any kind of food or porrage or whatever, she was always very rough. She’d bash the tree bowl onto the table so it always splashed all over and stained the table. The place where she thrived the most was in the pigpen with her peers (this might have been an instinctive characteristic as her mother was actually a (golden) pig). She died (or rather exploded) a week before her 60th birthday. Her daughter had baked a cake for her a week before, and when she found it in the pantry, she, as the pig she was, couldn’t help but to mash it into her own mouth. This was too much for her 4’ 11” long, already almost 700 pounds heavy body, and she cracked open. She died much too early for an elf (which of course she wasn’t). People say they put her in the coffin horisontally, so that she’d fit.